Thoughts

This post is a bit disjointed, but I felt I needed to share my thoughts about Monday’s tragedy in Boston.  It’s been talked about anywhere and everywhere, so I’m sorry if this post is crossing that line about how much talking about the bombings you can take.  However, I feel (as with many tragedies) it’s best to openly talk about things and not for everyone to keep it to themselves.  It’s good to share.  Besides the fact that Monday’s events are at least partially a running story and this is a running blog, I needed to just simply share what feelings and thoughts that were on my mind.  Again, it helps to share – showing we’re all united in our thoughts and feelings.

I was happy with myself this past Monday morning having actually remembered that it was Boston Marathon morning.  Usually I forget these once-a-year sporting events hours (the ones I care about anyway – i.e. running, cycling, soccer) after they happen.  Life gets in the way.  However on Monday morning I was planted in front of my laptop watching the live feed from Boston.  It was pretty early in the coverage, the women were a few miles down the road and the men had just started.  Americans Kara Goucher and Shalane Flanagan were still in the women’s lead bunch and American Jason Hartmann was out front of the slow to start men’s pack.

Because I worked later the late afternoon / evening work shift, I needed to get my run done in the morning.  That meant leaving the coverage while I ran my scheduled 4 miles.  Luckily I was safe and didn’t miss much.  I made it back in time to see the closing miles of the women’s race – watching Flanagan and Goucher get 4^th and 6^th respectively.  I stayed tuned in also to watch Hartmann finish 4^th in the men’s race, for the second year in a row.  After that though, it was time for a quick shower, a quick lunch, and then off to work.

It was only happenstance that I felt like checking the latest news on the NY Times website on my iPhone as I walked from my parking spot to work.  Only then, at what would’ve been about 2:50 pm central time, did I learn of the explosions.  A few hours later, especially when I got home, did the magnitude of the numbers that were injured and those who passed away really hit me.  My initial thoughts of the bombings though, and still really my main feeling now, is of total shock and despair.

Let me try to explain better with some background.  It’s not really been mentioned in the news coverage that the Boston Marathon isn’t just a typical large marathon – like Chicago, New York, or DC’s Marine Corps.  You don’t simply just sign up online and pay a fee.  You first have to qualify, and THEN you can sign up.  Sure there are some exceptions for charities, but the overwhelming majority of the runners in Boston worked not months, but YEARS to get there.  The families and friends of those runners supported them through those years, cheering at the good and bad marathons leading up to Monday, cheering most of all when their runner finally ran a marathon that was their BQ (Boston qualifier).  

The Boston Marathon then is a celebration for the runner and their friends and family.  (Well as much of a celebration it can be for the runner while having to run 26.2 miles.)  The day is about having a good time and soaking in the achievement.  Unfortunately the bombings pulled the rug right from under these celebrations.  There are no words that even come close to describing this feeling for me.  It turned an overwhelmingly positive event into a catastrophe.

Thinking of the spectators, the runners, and the friends and families – my heart just sinks.  My stomach literally is doing that “bottom dropping out” feeling typing this now, as it does every time I think of those affected by the bombings.  As a runner who has not only done marathons, but also wants to make it to Boston someday – I just feel horrible how the running community, the people of Boston, and all those on or standing next to the marathon course were robbed of their joyous morning out, a Monday morning that they were actually looking forward to on their calendars.  I feel for all of them.

That’s about all I can say about my thoughts and feelings from Monday.  I’m still wrapping my head around it – as if one can really.  Even this morning as the two men are being pursued by Boston and federal law enforcement, I still don’t know what to feel.  Anger, frustration, sadness…?  Really, I don’t understand any of the happenings of this week.  But really, even with all the facts that will eventually come out, will anyone?

While this is a blog I always link to in my “Other Blogs I Read” section to the right, I definitely want to point out The Boring Runner’s post about his Boston Marathon experience.  There are many editorials/thoughts posted all over blogs and on RunnersWorld.com from other runners who were there as well of course, but The Boring Runner’s “Boston Marathon Bombs – My Thoughts” post sums up the tragedy from a runner’s point of view best from all that I’ve read.

Moving forward, this seems to have not shaken the running community in the least bit.  The Boston Marathon already has said it isn’t going anywhere and runners still without question want to run in the Boston Marathon.  Many running groups got together during the week to have runs in support of the victims of the bombings.  Running is usually something done for one’s self – to achieve a race goal, losing weight, gaining fitness, etc.  This week however it’s a sign of unity, compassion, and even defiance against the terrorist acts.  Even on my solo runs on Tuesday and Wednesday, running was indeed different.  Thoughts of Boston never left my mind and they won’t for many runs to come.